So, as part of the ongoing drama, my Salary Indemnity plan (which covers a part of my salary while I'm unable to work) has indicated that I should visit a Psychiatrist for a more formal assessment.
I have: biweekly GP appointments, biweekly counselling sessions and occasional check ups with the Rehab Worker. Now, I need a Psychiatric Work Up.
However....it was really interesting, and I was a bit surprised how much the Good Doctor was able to uncover in the hour we spent together. It turns out that she has treated a large number of teachers in the District, and it turns out that she has seen conditions like mine all too often. She told me a number of things about my situation, including the fact that not only was I suffering the early warning signs of burn-out, I was also in the throes of Post Traumatic Stress DIsorder.
Pardon ME? I know I wasn't in Viet Nam, and almost certainly would recall a Tour of Duty in Desert Storm...
But yes, she continued, that is exactly what my condition was--my treatment by the district, and in particular the Evil and Incompetent Chipmunk, was so grueling, it created an episode of PTSD, most likely by triggering some unresolved *issue* from my childhood that left me feeling powerless, worthless or stupid. Or all of the above.
She also said that a benchmark for me to know when I would be able to return to work would be when I could tell my story and talk about my experiences without tearing up, and when I felt some kind of excitement about the job again.
Gah.....I have a lot of work to do.
So I feel better, and worse. This black place in my soul was always present, but had I not been so viciously maltreated by my employer, it would have continued to lurk, waiting, to be drawn out.
Like attracts Like, I guess.
Now what? Stay tuned....
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2 comments:
Whoa. That's intense.
With a history of employee mistreatment, why hasn't anything been done about the evil people in the district?
Are the that powerful? Or is denial the order of the day? Denial is the MO for my (soon to be former) district.
Well, it's the strangest thing-- "everyone" agrees that there is abuse of power, and nepotism and favouritism, yet--contracts are renewed, "consulting positions" are offered to retired administrators...etc etc etc. The public has the perception that Teacher Unions are SO powerful, we HAVE to have a heavy-handed administration, or we would just be...I don't know? Running amok?
It's the most bizarre and dysfunctional system I can imagine....
Thank you for your comment--and good luck!
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